Second Chances
Love, Fate, and Second Chances: Our Story
Second Chances
I don’t have the perfect marriage. And I’m not here to pretend I do—because, truthfully, I don’t think perfection exists in any relationship. But what we do have is real. It’s built on trust, love, commitment, and a deep understanding of one another. And after everything I’ve been through, that means more to me than all the diamonds in the world.
The last year, we celebrated our 17th wedding anniversary. It’s hard to believe how fast time flies, it feels like just yesterday we were tying the knot. And while our life together hasn’t always been easy (especially with the dynamics of a blended family), what we share is something I never thought I’d have again: peace, happiness, and unwavering support.
Do You Believe in Fate? I Do.
Before I met my husband, I didn’t believe much in fate. But now? I’m absolutely convinced.
Back when I started this blog, I wanted to share my recipes and pieces of my life. I had hoped to inspire women who had faced hardship like I had—abuse, divorce, low self-esteem.
But life got busy, and I focused more on the food (and let’s be honest, some of you prefer it that way… haha!). But today, I want to share our story, because it’s one of love, resilience, and the beautiful way fate works.
The Beginning of a New Chapter
I was 19 when I entered into a marriage I thought was love. It wasn’t. It turned into a deeply abusive relationship. I tried to walk away many times over those 10 years, but as anyone who’s been in that kind of situation knows, it’s not as simple as it seems.
While still in that marriage, I worked in corporate. One day, I applied for a new job and little did I know, so did my future husband. We both started at the same company on the same day and were introduced to our colleagues together.
My first thought? “He really doesn’t have any dress sense!” He looked a bit nerdy. But over time, I discovered what really mattered, his kindness, humility, respect, and quiet strength.
At that job, I didn’t receive the warmest welcome from my female colleagues. Apparently, I looked “too snobbish.” If you’re Indian, you’ll know—we can be very judgmental. (Don’t come for me… you know it’s true! Lol!)
So I gravitated toward a group of three male colleagues, and guess what? He was one of them. We became best friends, sharing everything from laughs to life struggles.
From Friends to Forever
Eventually, I gathered the courage to end my marriage. I’ll never forget visiting an astrologer afterwards who told me, “You’re going to marry a colleague.” I laughed as I didn’t believe it for a second. I was expecting some handsome newcomer, maybe? Definitely not him… or so I thought.
A year later, my best friend asked me out on a date. I wasn’t interested romantically at first, but I trusted him. I knew who he was at his core, and that was everything. So I said yes. And, well, the rest is history.
We got married five years later, after navigating judgement, disapproval, and whispers from the community. As an Indian woman, divorced and then marrying a bachelor? I heard it all. I was “not good enough” , I was “second-hand”, “the woman with baggage”, “he deserved better”. But we proved everyone wrong. We built a beautiful, blended life, one that’s stood the test of time.
Doing What’s Best for You
To anyone going through something difficult, to anyone being judged for their choices—keep going. Only you know what’s right for your life. No one else gets to write your story but you.
People write to me all the time, saying that my little posts give them hope. That maybe, just maybe, their lives can turn around too. And to those women, I say: Yes. Yes, it can. I’m living proof.
Introducing… My Hubby!
Today, I’m sharing the first-ever photo of my husband on the blog! He’s probably not going to be thrilled about it (what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him, right? Haha!). But it felt right to introduce him as part of this story, because he’s been one of the biggest blessings, besides my kids, in my life.
In the End…
I’ve learned that happiness isn’t about material things. It’s about feeling safe, seen, and supported. After everything I’ve endured, I don’t need grand gestures. I just need respect, honesty, and commitment—and I’ve found that in him.
If you’re still waiting for your second chance, keep the faith. You never know what fate has in store.
With love,
Lorraine
First Published – September 16, 2020 – Updated – June 04,2025
Hi Lorraine. I love using your recipes but this post was the best for me. I loved reading about your life as it was so relatable. I too have been in a physical and emotionally abusive relationship at a young age for 5 years. It was the hardest thing ever to let go and I tried several times to leave. He made promises to change but he never did. One day I just woke up and decided that I never want to feel this way again and that I’m never going to let someone put me down and disrespect me again because I’m worth so much more and so I walked away. My parents got divorced when I was a child and I never want to suffer the way my mum did or have my future kids grow up in a broken home. I want a happy home and for my kids to feel the love and support between their parents. I know I’m deserving of respect and peace and love and a relationship isn’t supposed to be so toxic. I also made a ‘friend’ along the way who knew about my relationship issues and he made me believe in myself again. And what my ex wasn’t willing to do in 5 years, this friend did in only a few months. We’re still in the early stages and who knows what the future holds but he’s a sweet, gentle and peaceful soul that’s always looking out for me and constantly trying to improve himself for me and make me believe in myself. He’s constantly encouraging me to achieve great things and make me see my worth and that helped me move on from this abusive relationship. My ex only had wealth to offer me and he thought that would be enough for me, but I too am not materialistic. I’d rather be with someone that isn’t wealthy but makes me feel as if I have all the riches in the world because of the love, care and support that he has to offer me. I’m still in the healing stages but I have faith in what the future holds and I’m happy to know that there are great men like your husband out there.
I wish you and your husband many more years of love and happiness.
Thank you so much for your message! I wish you the best with your new life. I am positive that everything will work out for the best and you will once again be happy and receive the respect and love you’re worthy of. Good luck:-)
Dear Lorraine, when one shares their life experiences it encourages other women to believe in themselves. Thank you for sharing this and your absolutely wonderful recipes. I came across your page whilst looking for a chillie bite recipe and am so glad I stopped to take a peak. Keep on sharing 🙂
Thank you Charmaine. I totally agree with you. My posts are meant to give other women a glimpse of hope. Take care and thanks for taking the time to message me:-)
Wow! you are incredible.
I found your site while looking for a mince curry recipe …. well…. I ended up here, on this post 😀
I love the way you write, you connect and story tell so well, its almost as if its being told to me, instead of me simply reading.
I’m siting at work, a little happier in knowing through the darkness you found light – a lot of women never see happiness.
Thank you, for your recopies and your personality.
God Bless you & your family
Thank you so much Michelle. I appreciate your kind words, it means a lot because writing is a challenge for me. Take Care and Stay Safe:-)
Hi Lorraine
Thanks for sharing your story, I can relate to it since I’ve lived thru abuse for 14 years but thank God I’ve finally found someone that treats me like I deserve to be treated. Your story will inspire other women’s who have lived thru that abuse, I’m enjoying your recipes, keep up the great work!!!
Thank you so much Charmaine. I think so many woman are too afraid to share their story because we are judged so easily. I am so happy to hear that you’ve walked away from abuse and you are treated well. I wish you all the best and loads of happiness. Take Care:-)
hello there Lorraine….glad i stumbled on to your site….
what an interesting compilation of recipes…i love the simplicity of your writing and the easy recipes…..
its an interesting read..your tips and advice are great….
thank you for sharing your life….definitely will encourage and help the many out there in similar situations.
i have already printed a few of your recipes to keep in my kitchen…..
take care .
from Sue N ( another happy woman who has a gentleman as a partner)
Thank you so much Sue:-)
Your story is certainly inspirational, that is for sure.
Just like you, I love thyme and I met my husband at work at corporate too. It was the opposite though as he was the one divorced but because he was white I faced judgement too. Sometimes I feel as Indians we are subjected to it from birth. While I may never have experienced the kind of abuse you have been dealt with. I can say you are a breath of fresh air. Like my sister says “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger – and strength to you for the experiences you have endured. I would have considered myself a good cook however experience goes out the window when you have a husband that does all the cooking – I cooked once maybe twice a year (yes you read right!). After almost 10 years of marriage, I am now re-venturing the kitchen (previous known as husbands domain). so after cooking twice in as many weeks I am now attempting my third dish (samp and beans with lamb curry) and I needed a refresher so I consulted Mr Google – this search brought me to your site. I hope to find more inspiration as I definitely intend on being a regular visitor.
Thank you so much for your kind words Marienita. Wishing you all the happiness in the world and hope you enjoy your time in the kitchen:-)
Dear Remarkable Courageous honest to goodness Lorraine
Truly a person that’s humble honest and down to earth. Your recipes, your personality all imbibe a simple but superwoman in her truest form. Thank you for always sharing everything that is good🙏🏼.
Thank you so much dear Iris. I always appreciate your kindness and support:-)
😀 What a beautiful love story. May your marriage be blessed, lots of fun and great adventures ahead. I absolutely love your recipes. I have the app on my phone for quick easy access. I am new to cooking, because I got married late and also never bothered to learn to cook. Your recipes are easy to follow and absolutely delicious. Keep up the amazing work. God’s blessings
Hi Lorraine…
Thank you for inspiring message of hope…As indians we are truely blessed with amazing talent and our parents have certainly instilled morals and values in us that we can shape and mould our lives into…
The one most important set back is that most of our mums always “”worried what people will say”” and mine was that for sure. I too married at 20, was often abused…physically and emotionally…I wasnt brave enough to leave…I was always worried about how it would affect my 2 children and my mum. I had amazing parents and I also wanted to live their magical life..but it wasnt so. Living with laws didnt make it any easier either…but we eventually moved out and started afresh. the bullying continued, the punches stopped. We eventually relocated to Johannesburg and at the age of 38 I had another beautiful boy…
My life was filled with alot of struggles, financially. My husband tried in vain to pursue his own business after years of working, He also developed gout at the age of 29, it got progressivley worse, our relationship did lose its lustre from my side, due to the early abuse and I found a new life and joy in raising my kids and growing with them. He loved me obsessively, jealousy played a huge part and it never ended. Over the last 7 years, my husbands health deteriorated drastically. He became emotionally abusive towards me and the kids, we ended severe trauma throughout this time…lots and lots of sadness…
He passed away two years ago…
We miss him terribly and try very hard to let go of the sad times and to look forward…
I’ve been lonely in my relationship with him, as a woman of 54, I secretly wish to find my fairytale love, I know it seems far fetched, but every single human deserves happiness…and maybe one day I will find my happy ever after…thank you for helping me to open up. Besides your delightfull cooking, as well as beautiful pictures and tik-toks, I think you are an incredible woman, yes Indians are judgemental, especially against each other, but you weathered the storm, I am so proud of you, and happy for you as well. Look at you now….keep going…